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What is BDSM in sex and how to get rid of BDSM addiction?

Sexual relations have gone beyond the ordinary sexual intercourse between a man and a woman. In the modern world, people are not shy about expressing their true desires in order to fully enjoy sex. BDSM gained particular popularity after the release of the movie “50 Shades of Grey”.

What does BDSM mean?

A special kind of role-playing game based on the erotic exchange of power and other forms of sexual relations. A person receives satisfaction through dominance or submission in bed. Understanding what BDSM is, it is worth noting that members of this subculture use strict rules that ensure safety.

It is necessary to understand how BDSM is deciphered in order to better understand the essence of this direction, since three basic principles are encrypted in them:

  1. BD – bondage and discipline. This includes various types of bondage and mobility restrictions, as well as disciplinary and role-playing games.
  2. DS – dominant and submissive. Sexual relations in which, by agreement, there is an inequality of partners.
  3. SM – sadism and masochism. Various activities that give pleasure from inflicting or experiencing physical pain.

BDSM as a subculture

This trend has a huge number of directions in which you can determine the preferences of the participants. They can both be combined and exist separately from each other. Surveys have shown that 71% of men and 11% of women with heterosexual orientation choose the role of a dominant for themselves, but 29% of men and 89% of women like to be a subordinate.

BDSM practices involve the use of various paraphernalia, for example, items made of leather, latex, steel, and so on. The most popular are things intended for physical impact on a person: whips, stacks and much more. The BDSM subculture has its own emblem, which is based on the ancient triskelion symbol. The presence of three elements is directly related to the three principles of this direction.

bdsm as a subculture

Types of BDSM

The main varieties of such sexual relations are reflected in its abbreviation and it is worth talking about them in more detail.

  1. Bondage and discipline. One of their partners is fixed with the help of different devices in one position. Many perceive BDSM as an art, so dominants try to tie a partner in the most beautiful, in their opinion, pose. Only people who absolutely trust each other can use bondage, since the absolute power of one and the complete insecurity of the other person are established.
  2. Submission and domination. Such roles are used not only by BDSM relationships, they are also applicable to ordinary life. Many believe that the dominant and the submissive are the psychotypes of people.
  3. Masochism and sadism. This type involves inflicting psychological or physical pain on a sexual partner. The masochist takes pleasure in being hurt, while the sadist takes pleasure in the application of pain. You can deliver discomfort in different ways and sensations can be of different intensity. It is worth mentioning that “psychological sadomasochism” stands out separately, for example, when a man cheats, and a woman experiences pleasure knowing this.

What is BDSM in sex?

To better understand this sexual direction, you need to know three basic principles:

  1. Safety. BDSM domination implies the knowledge of the basics of anatomy, medicine and physiology, so that the methods of satisfaction used do not cause harm.
  2. Sanity. The principle indicates that partners can only practice those techniques in which they understand.
  3. Voluntariness. Both partners must agree to BDSM contact, and it is also important to use a stop word, which is necessary so that the submissive can stop the process at any time.

types of bdsm

What is included in BDSM?

Both partners must understand the varieties of this direction in order to initially determine what is exciting and what is repulsive. For those who are interested in what is possible in BDSM, we will offer the most popular types of contacts:

  1. Moral humiliation, implying the use of various dirty words and obscene language in relation to a partner.
  2. Flagellation – striking with hands or various objects on the feet, chest, face, buttocks and even genitals.
  3. Restrictions on the freedom of a partner, for which bindings, suspensions, and so on are used.
  4. Role-playing games based on the humiliation of a partner, for example, the scenario of parents-children, boss-subordinate, and rape is also very popular.
  5. Depriving a person of sight, hearing or smell with the help of various gags, ear plugs and other methods.
  6. Many are interested in what is needed for BDSM, and so one of the most popular types involves the use of candles to burn a partner with wax and flame. Often used games with electricity, which affect the nipples and genitals.

How to try BDSM?

Beginners who want to try new sensations need to know and consider some rules:

  1. First you need to determine what sensations you want to experience, what is acceptable and what is forbidden. Be sure to consider the three main principles of this subculture.
  2. Both partners should be aware of BDSM, and having trust is of great importance. It is necessary to decide who will obey and who will rule.
  3. Choose a stop word that should be neutral and understandable to both participants in the action.
  4. Knowing what the abbreviation BDSM is, you can guess that during the process, many are addicted, which often leads to bruises and other injuries. It is better to pre-paint the script of the action.

what does bdsm mean

How to do BDSM?

Many beginners tend to repeat different techniques that they have seen in porn or read in public, but it is better to start small and master everything step by step. For those who are interested in how to do BDSM correctly, we offer several options for beginners:

  1. Hand binding. This is the easiest way to enhance feelings. You just need to tie your hands behind your head and the partner experiences new sensations. It is important not to tighten your arms too tightly and do not use ropes made of synthetic materials.
  2. Temperature games. It is best to focus on the temperature difference. For example, you can do a warming massage, and then use an ice cube. Beginners are not recommended to take hot wax and hot metal objects.
  3. Spanking. People who know what BDSM is understand that this is what regular spanking is called. There are three main rules to keep in mind. First you need to warm up the body, so the first spanking should be soft. Concentrate on the same places, increasing the power of the blow. The second rule involves keeping the rhythm. At the end of the process, it is necessary to lubricate the buttocks with panthenol, which will help the skin recover faster.

How to get rid of BDSM addiction?

There are people for whom such sexual relationships begin to bring discomfort, and then it is important to find a way to cope with addiction.

  1. Recognizing a problem is the first step towards solving it. There are even special groups that are created to help each other.
  2. Sometimes BDSM relationships are like fetters that hold a person back and prevent him from enjoying other things. In this case, it is better to find an experienced psychologist who can find the root of the problem.
  3. It is recommended to remove all objects related to sex from the house so that there is no temptation.
  4. It is necessary to direct your energy in a different direction so that all thoughts are occupied with a new business.



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