How to talk about it?

It is very important not to postpone the conversation until the moment when you are both already in bed – and then you take out the handcuffs. BDSM is one of those pleasures that you have to negotiate ahead of time. For example, at dinner or in another relaxing environment. Most likely, he also had such thoughts, but he was afraid that you would not appreciate them. So go ahead!


Be sure to discuss the details: where are you both ready to go, what accessories do you need.

How to prepare?

You can start by watching adult videos and learn some practical information along the way. Besides, it’s easier to point your finger at “let’s try this” than to try to explain your fantasies in detail. An interesting point: you can not assign permanent roles “from above” and “from below”, but change. And you don’t have to have sex like this at home: if you rent a hotel room in a new environment, perhaps both of you will be liberated.

How to do BDSM?

There are many options, here are just a few examples.

1. Binding

You can buy game handcuffs, but this is not necessary at all. You can take, for example, a strong rope that does not cut into the skin, or belts. One partner ties the other’s arms above their heads or ties them to posts at the corners of the bed. But only after discussion and with mutual trust!


2. Flip flops

This is not a punishment from childhood, but an exciting sex game. According to statistics, every fourth American dreams of being spanked during sex (such polls have not been conducted in Russia). You don’t need to get carried away – it’s not about bruising.

3. Stop word

This is an essential element of any game. If one of you doesn’t like something, there must be a way to stop the process. The word “no” is not appropriate, because it can be part of the game. It is best to choose a neutral one – for example, “cherry”.

4. Role play

Yes, yes, those same games with dressing up, although if you have imagination, you can do without costumes. For those who get carried away, there is an advanced option – transfer the game to a bar (for example, if you are staying at a hotel) and start a conversation there.

after sex

Remember that your relationship is more important than a new sexual experience. Discuss with your partner what happened, tell us what you liked and what you didn’t like. And most importantly – do you want to continue in the same spirit!