One of the subscribers of my blog “Masha, come on!” sent a tearful letter stating that she had less and less sex with her husband. “He can play for hours! What can I do to make my naked body excite him more than GTA? Surprisingly, there are plenty of letters from girls with similar complaints. Men’s messages have a different character: “There are two meetings at work, then you stand in a traffic jam for a couple of hours, then you have to run to the grocery store. When I come home, I don’t want anything anymore, but she demands romance!”


Nataliya Vaitkevich/ Pexels

I can understand guys: many things are more interesting than sex, for example, the House of Cards series, Battlefield 1 on the console, a general chat about football with boys on WhatsApp, funny VKontakte publics, and you can also hang out on a car site, choosing the next car, phone, go for a run, huddle with a neighbor for a beer. But when I read such letters, I want to ask men one question: did you think at the age of 13, leafing through daddy’s magazines with naked ladies with trembling hands, that when you grow up, you will voluntarily give up intimacy? Of course not! But the problem is obvious – men want to spend their energy on sex less and less.


I see the main reason in the dominance of technology. Our dads didn’t sit on their smartphones, didn’t download TV shows and didn’t stick to them at midnight, so in the dark, they more often preferred other activities. What can not be said about contemporaries who only think how to enter the online game as soon as possible, and not into a woman.


Tima Miroshnichenko/ Pexels


Stress doesn’t add passion to a relationship either. Hard work, information overload – this is not at all erotic, so “Come on tomorrow!” and other excuses do not apply to you. He is really tired, and the instinct of self-preservation advises him to spend precious hours in bed on sleep, and not on a sex marathon.

Separately, it is worth mentioning the porn beloved by guys. Why strain, invest emotions in lovemaking, when in ten minutes you can get a guaranteed release? By the way, this is how addiction is born.

And today’s men overestimate the risks. A study at the University of Michigan showed that guys are more afraid of the consequences of reckless sex activity than accidents. Respondents agreed with the statement that the likelihood of dying from HIV in unprotected intercourse is 17 times higher than in a collision at speeds over 200 km/h. Adding fuel to the fire are stories of allegations of rape or of minors who appear to be adults.

Yes, he may not want sex, think that everything is fine, and be proud of the premium account on PornHub, but I advise you to discuss with your partner the reasons for the first signs of a “cooling”.